Tips on Winning the Belly Flop

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Tony is so fat, once he did a belly flop in San Francisco and the tidal wave travelled all the way to Japan.

The Belly Flop - How to Win; )

The one who wins the belly flop, deserves to, based on preparation and his or her Godly character habits. One who is patient in their relations with other people will stand out, in the eyes of belly flop judges and other powerful people.

The following people should be favored to win, in the Belly Flop:

1. Heavy in weight, but light in laziness. The belly flop contest gives heavy people an opportunity to prove their sporting skills, especially when people think they are uncoordinated. A skinny person could win, but should, most of the times, be the underdog, because there is less skin slapping the water.

2. Best Flop. The one who hits the waist and chest on the water at the same time, making a loud sound. The one who, before doing this, gets the most vertical air time he or she is capable of getting. The one who keeps his or her arms somewhere between straight out and slightly up (towards the top of their head), from the beginning to end while in air. The one who doesn't move their upper body, while in the air. The one who does not push at the water to soften the painful slap. The one who takes the pain of the water slap as a condition of winning.

3. Most Cheers from Crowd. The belly flopper could ask for this ahead of time. The cheers must come immediately after the sound of the slap on the water. Anything else would seem like fake approval.

4. The one who doesn't really want to win, but is prepared and does everything right.

5. The one with a profession that is more important than the Belly Flop contest. The one who enjoys their profession. The one who enjoys being the best at everything they want to be the best at doing.

6. The one who asks God to win the night before, to then become a small-time spokesperson for the Belly Flop.

7. The one who has a quality (usually a spiritual gift in character) that judges look up to.

8. The one who talks little when in the presence of a successful person. The one who knows that to become a success in life, one must cultivate patience using self-control.

Fanning Springs Belly Flop Contest